There is sadness, and then there is heartbreaking sadness. I have learned in life that it doesn't have to be a significant other to break your heart. Friends can too. And what happens when someone first breaks your heart as a significant other, (remains one of your very best friends), and then breaks your heart as your friend? Pure misery. That's what.
I am at a complete loss for words. I have always tried to hold true to the mantra "Do unto others...". People do not always treat you with respect in return. And usually I don't care...I don't let it get to me. But I care this time. Not something I am used to. It's an unbelievable sadness. I feel lost. The loss of our friendship is what hurts the most. Not the way I have been treated or talked to. Don't get me wrong...that hurts too. But it's the loss of our friendship that hurts the most. Knowing I can't simply pick up the phone to share good news, or having someone there to tell me things are going to be ok. Not having late night conversations after work, whether they are in person, or via phone. Having someone in your life who has seen you at your absolute worst, and knowing their secrets too. But even more than that is the not judging each other for these things. Having someone who FINALLY chased the nightmares away. These are the things I miss the most.
I know that time heals all pain. But right now it still makes me incredibly sad. I know with time I will pick the pieces up and put them all together again. I will rise and go forward. Because in the end, it's what I do... no matter how hard it is. It's just that everyone knows when a heart breaks, it never breaks even...
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