Pieces Of Me...

   I have been using the past few days to reflect on my life.  What I have experienced, what I have yet to experience.  What I can't wait to see come to fruition, what I wish I had never been through.  And I have found that some of this has surprised me. 
   I am grateful for every life experience I have had thus far, because; in the end, it has led me to who/where I am today.  It has not always been pretty.  It has not always been fun.  But it has always been real. 
   I know that I have become numb to certain feelings, and certain things in my life.  Some people have said I am a little jaded...I prefer to say realistic.  ;)  However, as of late, I am wondering if maybe I will be able to come back around and experience these things again...to feel again.  And I have to say I really think that I will.
   Some of my life experiences I have talked about.  Some I have told a select few, and will probably never post about them.  Who knows, maybe one day I will be brave enough to do a post about them.  But suffice it to say, I had a rough time for a little while.
   Trust is a HUGE deal to me.  I have been proven time and time again that trust is broken.  In the worst ways.  I have always known that my happiness can never depend on other people.  But when a trust is broken, it so hard to recover.  And then you add that trust being broken multiple times by the same person, and then by different people...it sometimes seems that recovery is virtually impossible.  People do and say things that you would NEVER imagine them doing or saying.  Sometimes they say things they don't mean (as in I love you), and when that happens, that hurts too.  Actually that one probably hurts the most.  By then, it is just simply too late.  When you encounter this several times during the span of several years, you become numb. 
   So I have been going through life, in a way, numb.  And when you least expect it, things begin to happen, and someone comes into your life who shows you that the numbness does not have to be a forever thing.  Eventually, without even knowing it, they have started to take the pieces of me and are helping them become whole again.  And that feels great.  :)